You Can’t Change Him or Her…

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My ex brought out the worst in me. In his defense, I was also a nut-job when I dated him. I was insecure and brought out the worst in him too. We weren’t right for each other, but we still spent 5 years trying to change each other. Towards the end of our relationship, it just wasn’t there anymore. Not only was I growing up, but it was an “a-ha” moment for me (Oprah reference). The ex was not the person who I was supposed to end up with….and it wasn’t because he was mean or a jerk; it was because I couldn’t change him and he couldn’t change me.We weren’t ourselves with each other, we didn’t like who the other person was. It sounds harsh, but I didn’t think he was evil or anything. Granted, we went through some pretty f-ed up times and he hurt me a lot (and I hurt him too). I think, looking back….that we were both responsible for those times. We were young…and when it was all said and done, I learned a great lesson.

I spent 5 years with someone during an important time of growth. From 15-20 years old, I was hiding the real me to please someone else.   I ditched out on girls night out, family time, highschool activities, concerts, dating other boys because Continue reading